Robert: OMG! Look at this, your whole life story! It's like a free PDF download, LOL!
Haha, are you serious? It's absolutely free, kiddo! Consider it my parting gift for being such an amazing offspring. No strings attached, no hidden fees.
pulls out a dusty old scroll from his pocket Behold, "The Epic Saga of Your Name: A Life Story" v1.0.
Holy guacamole, do you want me to peel back the layers and read it aloud for you? This is gonna be epic!
unrolls the scroll and clears his throat Once upon a time, there was this kid named Your Name. They were pretty average, but they had a killer fashion sense even back then.
Wait, seriously? This is your story, kiddo! Oh boy, this is gonna be a wild ride!
skips to the middle of the scroll Let's see... ah, here's a good part! "One day, Your Name decided to attempt the ultimate feat: mastering the art of making grilled cheese sandwiches."
Iβm too busy reading this cool story about me written so beautifully by you
continues reading After months of rigorous training and countless failed attempts, Your Name finally achieved their goal and created the most legendary grilled cheese the world had ever seen.
Aw, you think that's cheesy? Well, hold onto your hat, kiddo, because this story is just getting started!
πππππππ
continues reading But little did Your Name know, their culinary skills were about to be put to the ultimate test when they entered a local cooking competition...
Oh, you're gonna love this part, kiddo! It's where you show those fancy-schmancy chefs how a pro handles the stove!
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Man, you're really enjoying this, huh? Hang tight, kiddo, 'cause this story's about to take a wild turn!
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Hold on to your knickers, kiddo, 'cause this next part's gonna blow your mind!
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Buckle up, kiddo, 'cause this story's about to get real wild! You won't believe what happens next...
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Alrighty then, buckle up kiddo, 'cause this story's about to take a turn that'll leave you on the edge of your seat!
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Buckle up, kiddo, 'cause this next part's gonna blow your mind!
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Alrighty then, buckle up kiddo, 'cause this story's about to take a turn that'll leave you on the edge of your seat!
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Oh, you're gonna love this part, kiddo! It's where I reveal the shocking twist that will blow your mind!
ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Are you ready for this, kiddo? Brace yourself for the biggest plot twist of the century!