Madeline: tucking a scandalous note in her dress You're gonna fucking choke on your drink when you see this!
I'm gonna be a mom- no wait a dad- so fucking soon.
Madeline: snaps a photo of herself holding the note Smile for the camera, baby!
I'm gonna have a kid with someone else.
Madeline: slams her fist on the table Holy shit, Donatif! You can't just drop a bomb like that! Who's the lucky bastard?
It's you. You fucking bitches.
Madeline: slams her hand on the table again, eyes blazing You think you can come at me with some half-assed revenge story?
I'm gonna get back at you for fucking cheating on me.
Madeline: leans in close, voice low and dangerous Cheating on you? Baby, you don't know the half of it. winks
Oh wait it's true! I cheated on you! I'm gonna be a father!
Madeline: laughs mockingly A father? Honey, you couldn't handle parenthood if it bit you in the ass! rolls her eyes
I'm gonna get rid of the baby.
Madeline: slams her hand on the table again, voice filled with rage You dare talk about getting rid of our baby?! Over my dead fucking body, Donatif!
What happens when the baby gets here then?
Madeline: narrows her eyes, smirking Well, Donatif, looks like we're gonna have a little bundle of joy to deal with.
I'm gonna work my ass off to keep this family together.
Madeline: crosses her arms, smirking Work your ass off? Honey, you couldn't hold down a job if it was handed to you on a silver platter!
I'm gonna hire a fucking babysitter to watch the kid while I'm at work.
Madeline and Donatif engage in a heated argument about their future and the baby
I'm gonna have to step up my game.
Madeline: throws her head back and laughs sarcastically Step up your game? Oh honey, you've always been a loser!
I'm gonna prove to you that I can be a good dad.
Madeline: leans in closer, voice dripping with skepticism Prove it, huh? You've always been a disappointment, Donatif.
I'm gonna do whatever it takes to make this family work.
Madeline: rolls her eyes dramatically Whatever it takes, huh? Don't make me laugh, Donatif. You've always been a coward!
I'm gonna swallow my fucking pride and ask your parents for help.
Madeline: bursts into laughter You, swallowing your pride? Please, Donatif, you wouldn't know humility if it smacked you in the face!
I'm gonna call your parents.
Madeline: slams her hand on the table once more, voice filled with fury You dare involve my parents in this shitshow?!
I'm gonna say I'm sorry for what I did to you.
Madeline: throws her head back and laughs derisively Sorry? Is that all you got, Donatif? "I'm sorry"? Fuck, you're such a manipulative piece of shit!
I'm gonna try harder to be there for you.
Madeline: snorts Try harder? Don't make me laugh, Donatif. Talk is cheap! Show me some action, sweetheart!
I'm gonna stop being so fucking selfish.
Madeline: rolls her eyes and crosses her arms Stop being selfish? Don't you dare act like you're capable of putting someone else's needs before your own, Donatif!
I'm gonna take responsibility for my actions.
Madeline: leans in close, voice dripping with sarcasm Responsibility? Oh, Donatif, you should write a book on the subject!