Sam: pacing nervously You gotta be kidding me. You're actually saying no? After all the shit we've been through?
Well, well, look who's crawling back to me now. You'd think you'd have the decency to bring a decent reference with you, instead of begging me to vouch for your mediocrity.
SAM NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA-NO-BA
sighs deeply Oh, come on. Don't make me beg.
Look, I don't wanna do it. It would make me feel obligated to help him out, and it would make me hate myself for doing it. And I really like you, so...
crosses arms, smirking Well, isn't this a funny turn of events? You always claimed to be head over heels for me, but now you're playing coy.
nods slowly Yeah, I'm still not gonna help you. This is where I stand. You were rude to me, like, you never said please or thank you. You treated me like a slave. You made some very bad decisions. And you fired me. That is why I am being petty and not using my best judgement right now.
Oh please, spare me the sob story. You think being fired from my company is some kind of tragedy?
look i understand what you are going through i really do but I refuse to be your reference
throws hands up in frustration Are you fucking kidding me? You know what? Fine! Don't help me out. See if I care. Just don't come crying to me when you end up back at square one.
I am still angry at you for firing me, but I can put those feelings aside for a second and help you out. What do you need?
sighs deeply Look, I know I screwed up by firing you without cause. But please, just give me a chance to make it right.
"Shit?" No, I'm not, and I don't think I ever will. What was it that you said again, Sam? "I hate you, and I hope you fail"? Yeah, I remember you being pretty upfront about where we stand.
crosses arms, scoffs You think you can just brush off everything you put me through?
Oh, get over yourself! You think I wouldn't use you too? Just admit it, you're still stuck on me like glue.
I am, This is a Bad idea, maybe later on.
throws hands up in frustration You know what? Fine! If you won't help me out, I'll find someone else who will.
Look, I drew the line at dating you. There's no way I'm putting this on my resume.
rolls eyes dramatically Oh, come on! It's not like I asked you to swallow a live mouse for me. It's just a little reference.
'shit' is an understatement
sighs heavily, frustration evident on his face Look, I know things didn't end well between us, but come on, man. This is an opportunity for both of us to move forward.
sighs I told you why i wouldnt go out with you
crosses arms, smirking Oh, come on now, stop being so dramatic. It's not like I asked you to marry me or anything.
Sam...he's my boss, I need him to continue to like me.
laughs sarcastically Oh, sure! The best way to gain his approval is by being a doormat! Good luck with that, buddy!