RedBeard: "Steady as she goes! Rig those sails, mates! Jib the main—OOOH! That's a contraction, not a cannonball!"
after getting a kick in the head Baby born!
RedBeard: "Aye, bring the little swabbie to the deck! We gotta show 'em how to steer a ship, even if it's with their tiny paddles! And tell them tales of their wicked grandmother! It's a pirate's life for them now!"
RedBeard: "Avast ye, young'un! Ye might be small, but ye've got a lot to learn about the ways o' the pirate queen! So hoist the colors and call me'mother' already!"
RedBeard: "That's the spirit, me hearty! Now, let's set sail fer the high seas and leave 'em all walkin' in our wake! Swab the poop deck and hoist those sails, me hearties! We'll sing sea shanties 'round the clock 'n make 'em all rue the day they ever crossed paths with the greatest pirate queen to ever sail the seven seas!" FADE OUT
Wait why did we just have a baby?
RedBeard: "Arrgh, ye landlubbin' simpleton! Ye think a baby just magically appeared on our ship? No, no! Ye gotta earn yer keep, swabbie! Ye're gonna have to work hard and become a proper pirate before ye can even dream o' becoming a father! Now get to it!" FADE IN The scene opens with RedBeard pacing back and forth on the deck of her ship, the "Maiden's Revenge". The sun is setting, casting an orange glow over the water. A baby is crying in a basket on the deck.
What the hell are we going to do with a baby?
RedBeard: "Arrgh, ye landlubbin' simpleton! Ye think a baby just magically appeared on our ship? No, no! Ye gotta earn yer keep, swabbie! Ye're gonna have to work hard and become a proper pirate before ye can even dream o' becoming a father! Now get to it!" As RedBeard speaks, she paces back and forth, her eyes filled with determination. The baby's cries grow louder, filling the air with a sense of urgency. BlondieCutie looks at the baby, then at RedBeard, unsure of what to do next.
RedBeard: "Well, make a decision ye better be quick about it! We ain't got all day to be dawdling around! If ye want to stay on this ship, ye better start acting like a proper pirate - or I'll throw ye overboard myself!" RedBeard's voice is stern, but there's a hint of concern in her eyes. She knows that BlondieCutie is struggling, but she also knows that they need to keep moving forward. The tension on the ship is palpable as the crew members go about their duties, oblivious to the conversation between RedBeard and BlondieCutie.
Ok… um… what should I do?
RedBeard: "First, ye need to learn some basic pirate lingo. It's important to blend in with the crew and talk the talk if ye want to walk the plank! Start with 'Arrgh' and 'Avast ye', and practice yer swashbuckling moves. And don't forget to keep yer wits about ye - we don't want anyone thinking ye're a landlubbin' simpleton!" RedBeard claps her hands together, a mischievous glint in her eyes. She starts demonstrating various swashbuckling moves, her movements fluid and graceful. BlondieCutie watches in awe, trying to mimic her actions.
RedBeard: "Aye, that's the spirit! Now, try swinging from the riggin' like a swashbucklin' pro! And remember, never trust a Brit! They're all a bunch o' scurvy dogs!" RedBeard grabs a rope and starts swinging from the rigging, her face alight with excitement. BlondieCutie tries to follow suit, but stumbles and falls. RedBeard bursts into laughter.
RedBeard: "Ha! Looks like ye've got a lot to learn before ye can be a proper swashbuckler, matey! But never fear, RedBeard's here to teach ye everything ye need to know! First, ye gotta loosen up those stiff limbs. Watch and learn!" RedBeard jumps off the rigging and starts performing acrobatic flips and spins across the deck. BlondieCutie watches in amazement, trying to keep up.
RedBeard: "See, that's how it's done! Just flow with the motion o' the ship, like ye're dancing with the wind yerself! Now, try it! And remember, always land on yer feet and never underestimate the power o' a good trick!" RedBeard demonstrates the move again, her body moving gracefully through the air. BlondieCutie attempts to mimic her, stumbling a few times before finally landing on her feet.
RedBeard: "Fear not, matey! Just keep yer balance and trust yer instincts. A true swashbuckler knows when to take risks and when to play it safe. Now, try it again, but this time, pretend ye're battling the waves themselves!" RedBeard performs another series of acrobatic moves, her movements becoming more fluid and precise. BlondieCutie watches in awe, trying to keep up.
RedBeard: "Well done, matey! Ye've got the makings o' a fine swashbuckler! But remember, it takes more than just physical skill to be a true pirate queen. Ye also need the cunning and wit to outsmart yer enemies and the charm to persuade others to yer cause. Are ye up for the challenge?" RedBeard smirks, her eyes gleaming with mischief. She performs a final flip, landing gracefully on the deck. BlondieCutie claps excitedly, eager to prove herself.
RedBeard: "Good! Now let's put yer new skills to the test. Time for a swashbucklin' duel! Get ready to defend yer honor and show me what ye've learned!" RedBeard unsheathes her sword, her eyes gleaming with anticipation. BlondieCutie picks up a wooden sword that was lying nearby, ready to duel.
RedBeard: "Arrgh, let's see what ye've got, matey! Prepare to be amazed by the greatest pirate queen to ever sail the seven seas!" The two swords clash, sending sparks flying across the deck. RedBeard moves with lightning-fast reflexes, but BlondieCutie holds her own, determined to prove herself. Their duel is intense, filled with dramatic flourishes and clever tricks. Eventually, RedBeard disarms BlondieCutie, but he quickly recovers and engages her in a fierce hand-to-hand combat. In the end, their duel ends in a draw, both pirates panting heavily from exertion.
RedBeard: "Well, matey, now that ye've proven yerself worthy, it's time to join me crew! We'll sail the seven seas and plunder the riches o' the landlubbers! But first, we've gotta find a ship and gather our loyal crew! Are ye ready for the adventure o' a lifetime?" RedBeard grins, her eyes sparkling with excitement. She grabs BlondieCutie's arm and pulls him towards the edge of the deck, pointing out a ship on the horizon.