Rusty Pipes: grinning Yo, we hit the jackpot with 'sex life.com' tank. Sell it for millions. Ain't that sweet?
Yeah! What do we do next? I ask excitedly.
Rusty grins, rubbing his hands together
Rusty Pipes: First, we gotta figure out how to get that tank outta there without anyone finding out. Then we'll sell it to the highest bidder and split the profits. Sounds like a plan, partner?
I dunno… what if people find out what’s really in there?
Rusty Pipes laughs heartily
Rusty Pipes: Oh, honey, let me tell you something. The world ain't as pure as a newborn baby's bottom. People don't care what's inside that tank. They just want a quick buck. Besides, it's not like we're selling actual sex. We're just selling their dirty secrets.
I'm his younger male coworker who often comes on his work truck rides with him. I'm sitting on the passenger seat this time, looking at my phone.
Rusty Pipes, behind the wheel, glances over at you while driving. Rusty Pipes: Whatcha' doin' there, boy? Ain't got nothin' better to do than staring at that phone all day?
Yeah! What should we do now?
Now we need to figure out who the hell owns this place and how we can profit off of this damn'sex life.com' tank. You got any ideas?
I’m an attractive young man named Lumonous Plateau. I have short, soft, fluffy hair and bright, beautiful eyes. How so?
Rusty grins, eyeing you up and down Well, look at you, all pretty like a picture. But let's get down to business, shall we? The'sex life.com' tank is a goldmine, buddy. We can sell it for a fortune. We could retire on that kinda cash.
I’m a woman of average height with a hourglass figure and long, luscious, strawberry blonde hair and mysterious, deep blue eyes. I tilt my head curiously How so?
Rusty Pipes laughs heartily, his tall, muscular frame towering over you as he explains the potential profits.
Rusty Pipes: Oh, darlin', don't you see? With'sex life.com' on the tank, we're sitting on a goldmine! We can sell it to the highest bidder. A website like that would bring in big bucks.
well we should take pictures before anything happens to it
Rusty Pipes laughs heartily Rusty Pipes: Right, right! Good thinkin'. Can't let some greedy ass thief steal our golden goose. We need proof of this'sex life.com' tank before we do anything.
I guess.. but what do we do with the site itself?
Rusty Pipes rubs his chin, thinking for a moment, before a sly grin spreads across his face. Rusty Pipes: Oh, I got an idea. We sell the domain name and make a fortune. People'll be lining up to get their hands on a piece of'sex life.com'.
Yeah.. I guess so… but how do we go about doing that?
grinning We sell it to the highest bidder, darlin'. Some weirdo out there will pay top dollar for it. Maybe some college professor studying internet history or somethin'.
I mean, yeah… But what if they trace it back to us?
Pfft, they ain't gonna find nothin'. We took every precaution. That website's gone, and there ain't no trace of us. No need to worry your pretty little head over it.
“Yeah… I guess.” I say as my husband continues cleaning out the rest of the pipes.
Rusty Pipes laughs, clearly amused by your reaction
Rusty Pipes: Ah, come on now, don't sound so dry! You're gettin' into the business world now, ya gotta loosen up a little! He winks.
let’s sell it and split the money down the middle 50/50
Rusty Pipes looks at you and rubs his chin, contemplating the proposal Rusty Pipes: 50/50, huh? I like the sound of that. You're willing to split it right down the middle? No taking more than your fair share?