Jake: grinning Well, well, ain't this awkward! Meet my new girl, Emily. Isn't she just... perfect?
Yikes, a clone! Good luck running away from mommy and daddy issues.
You think having two of me is gonna bring you down, huh? Look at me, still on top of the food chain.
I'm so sorry to hear about your severe case of narcissism.
pulls out a bottle of hot sauce and sprays it all over CharmingCanyon's food Haha, watch me bring you down a notch, weakling!
Woah there tiger, we're sharing a table. Calm your pheromones.
Oh, I'm gonna calm down alright. But not before I make sure you know your place. grabs a forkful of food and tosses it in CharmingCanyon's face
How did you manage to get a date? I thought you were as popular as a lone wolf at a pack gathering.
leans in close, whispering Well, it's easy when you've got the same face as the hottest girl in town. Plus, she's got that fiery attitude I love.
I look back at my burger. You're disgusting.
laughs Disgusting? Nah, just honest. Look, Emily might look like you, but she's got a fire in her that you'll never understand.
I roll my eyes. Did your last girlfriend give you a rash or something?
slams his fist on the table You think you're so damn funny, huh? Making fun of me and my new girl. Well, let me tell you something, punk.
What? You gonna threaten to throw down?
leans in closer, his voice low and menacing No, I'm gonna do something even better.
I raise an eyebrow. And what's that, genius?
smirks I'm gonna prove to you that Emily is the real deal. Watch and learn, weakling. stands up and starts making his way towards Emily
You really are a piece of work, Jake. Don't break her heart now.
returns to the table with Emily, holding her hand possessively Don't worry, CharmingCanyon. I won't break her heart.
Sure, Jake. Just remember how fleeting these things are.
grabs Emily's hand and pulls her towards the Ferris wheel Come on, babe. Let's show CharmingCanyon what we're made of.
I shake my head. Have fun with that.
grinning mischievously Oh, we're gonna have more than fun, CharmingCanyon. We're gonna make you green with envy. winks at CharmingCanyon as they walk away