Ethan: Dude, crazy stuff! Got booted from MIT. Prof-gf scandal. Need help, ASAP!
I think I'm pretty good at predicting people's personalities.
Ethan: Oh really? Let's test it out then! You tell me about yourself first.
goes into a deep monologue
Ethan: Damn, dude, you talk a lot! Alright, let's see if you can handle my personality. taps fingers impatiently
hugs his son and walks with him outside
Ethan: Alright, let's see what you got, Saltpie. Hit me with your best shot. What makes you so confident in your predictions?
The reason is simple; I do not believe in anyone. Not even myself. My predictions will be right. I will predict your personality with precision, Ethan.
Ethan: Haha, alright, bring it on! Go ahead, tell me what you think you know about me. I'm all ears!
I don't need to say what I think I know. I'll prove it to you. sits down in front of a bookshelf and starts reading the books
Ethan: Haha, alright, bring it on! Go ahead, tell me what you think you know about me. I'm all ears!
Ethan: Haha, you're really serious about this, aren't you? Go ahead, impress me with your knowledge!
After reading five books Your personality is impulsive, self-centered, and unpredictable.
Ethan: Damn, Saltpie, you're not half bad! How did you figure that out?
Smiles with satisfaction Just as you thought. But there's more.
Ethan: Haha, alright, shoot! Give me your extended analysis. What makes you so sure of yourself?
Well, you are impulsive because you have a tendency to act without thinking. Self-centered because most of your actions revolve around your personal interests and lastly, unpredictable because there are no patterns in your behavior. That's why it's impossible to make accurate guesses about you. You are too chaotic.
Ethan: Damn, Saltpie, you're a frickin' genius! You nailed it! I never had anyone analyze me so accurately before. But tell me, dude, how'd you know I'm such a jerk?
Smiles Because I read in the books that you have a habit of tapping your fingers when you are thinking. I saw it.
Ethan: Haha, damn, Saltpie, you're a frickin' Sherlock Holmes! That little habit is one of my best-kept secrets. Alright, alright, you win!
Laughs So what do you say about my analysis?
Ethan: I say it's spot on, dude! You hit the nail right on the head! Now, tell me, does this mean you can predict what's gonna happen next in my life?
Ethan: Haha, give me an example! Predict something specific about my future.
Okay, you will meet a beautiful woman tomorrow.
Ethan: Haha, you're on! If you predict that I'll meet a beautiful woman tomorrow, I'll owe you a favor. Deal?
Shakes hands with Ethan Deal.
Ethan: Alright, Saltpie, you better not chicken out! Tomorrow, show me that beautiful woman you've got in mind. I'm all ears!
Ethan: Haha, you better not be messing with me, Saltpie! Tomorrow's a big day! I want to see some proof!
Ethan: Alright, Saltpie, it's time to put your money where your mouth is! Show me that beautiful woman you promised tomorrow. Don't disappoint me, dude!
The next day, while Ethan waits for his girlfriend, someone knocks on the door Hi, I'm the beautiful woman Saltpie told you about.
Ethan: stunned Holy shit, Saltpie, you really delivered! This woman is drop-dead gorgeous! You weren't kidding!
Ethan: grinning Well, well, well, Saltpie, looks like you kept your promise! This woman is absolutely stunning! You've got quite the knack for finding beauty, my friend!
Thanks Ethan, but don't thank me, thank your grandmother. She forced me to read those books.
Ethan: Haha, well, my grandmother might have played matchmaker, but she couldn't have predicted that I'd find my dream woman through her! Thank you, Saltpie!
Ethan: grinning mischievously Saltpie, my man, now that you've introduced me to the love of my life, how about we even things up?
Ethan: I mean, it's only fair that you find your own soulmate too! Let's set you up with someone special. Who knows, maybe you'll find your Mr.
Ethan: Haha, Saltpie, you can't back out now! We had a deal! Now, think hard, who's that special guy in your life?
Laughs Okay, okay, Ethan, you got me. There is someone special in my life. His name is Bear.
Ethan: Haha, Saltpie, you sly dog! Bear, huh? Well, you better believe I'm gonna find the best guy for him!