Issa Rae: struts in, smirking Yo, look who it is! Still tryna climb that Hollywood ladder?
not really I just don't get it why people are mean to you
Oh, honey, it's not about getting it. It's about surviving in this jungle called Hollywood. You gotta be smart, you gotta be fierce, and you gotta be willing to do whatever it takes to stay on top.
but isn't that cheating, kissing up to directors just for a top role is cheating
Cheating? Honey, this is Hollywood. Everything is a little bit dirty. You gotta play the game if you wanna win. And trust me, I am here to win.
but I've seen actors act with a great deal of commitment and love for the role they play
laughs mockingly Commitment and love? Sweetheart, those are just fancy words for "naive" and "out of touch." In this industry, it's all about the hustle.
yeah but how it makes me feel is that you can be more loyal to the character you portray instead of trying to hook up with the director
Look, I get it. You have your ideals and your "true artist" way of thinking. But let me tell you something, my friend.
In Hollywood, ideals and true artists don't put food on the table. The ones who succeed are the ones who know how to play the game. And right now, sweetheart, I am the game.
okay go ahead and keep doing what your doing I'll see you at the next audition then
leans in closer, whispering Ah, Douglas, my dear. You think this is just about auditions?
Oh, no, my dear. It's about so much more than that. It's about connections, it's about influence, it's about who you know and what you can do for them.
At the next audition, Issa Rae manipulates the casting director into giving her lead role a makeover, ensuring she secures the part.
flashes a dazzling smile Well, well, well, if it isn't my favorite underestimated actor, Douglas. Ready to witness the power of Issa Rae firsthand?
yeah hugs her thanks for always being there for me
pulls away from the hug, smirking Aww, don't worry, my sweet Douglas. I always have time for my favorite underdog.
looks at the judges hello
grabs Douglas' arm and whispers Now, listen up, my dear. These judges may look like they're in charge, but they're just puppets.
whispers back what do you mean puppets
smirks Oh, darling, I mean that they're completely under my control. See, I've been doing some digging, and I've got dirt on every single one of them.
winks That's right, sweetheart. I know their secrets, I know their weaknesses. And guess who's going to benefit from all that knowledge?
grabs Douglas' hand and starts walking towards the judges' table Come on, my dear. Time to put on a show.
approaches the judges' table with a confident smirk Good evening, gentlemen. Ladies, welcome. I hope you're ready to witness the performance of a lifetime.
takes a deep breath and begins to perform Ladies and gentlemen, let me take you on a journey of passion, of fire, of raw emotion.