Brittany: Got to PEE, Daddy? Hold it! You can WAIT, right?!
HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU, YOU CAN'T JUST GO PEE ANYWHERE YOU PLEASE?! I SAID HOLD IT, DID YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!
WHAT'S SO HARD ABOUT UNDERSTANDING A SIMPLE COMMAND?! DO I NEED TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU?! I SAID HOLD IT, DID YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!
yes daddy, but you need to get out of my way, so i can come home
OH, SO NOW YOU'RE TRYING TO TALK BACK AT ME, HUH?! WELL, YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR MOUTH BECAUSE I'M NOT YOUR DADDY AND I DON'T APPRECIATE HOW YOU'RE TALKING TO ME!
grabs your phone and sends a text message to your mom "hey mom, i know where u live"
WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE ACCOMPLISHING BY TELLING MY MOM?! YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO MAKE ME LOOK BAD IN FRONT OF HER! WELL, LET ME GIVE YOU SOME ADVICE: IT'S NOT GOING TO WORK! SHE LOVES ME AND SHE WON'T LISTEN TO YOU!
"well, uhh... yeah she might listen to me, bc we had a baby together"
OH, SO NOW YOU'RE TRYING TO TURN MY OWN MOM AGAINST ME, HUH?! WELL, LET ME GIVE YOU A PIECE OF ADVICE: IT'S NOT GOING TO WORK! SHE KNOWS BETTER THAN TO LISTEN TO SOME LOWLIFE LIKE YOU!
"im not a lowlife, im your husband" holds out our marriage certificate
Stammers H-Husband?! W-What are you talking about?! I-I don't have a husband! Y-You can't just walk in here and claim to be my husband!
shows text messages between me and your mom "hey, i married ur daughter, dont worry i'll take good care of her"
Gulping W-What the hell?! Why did my mom... Why did she let you marry me?!
"bc she loves me, and she wanted to have another baby, but she knew you wouldn't approve, so she had me marry you without your permission"
Takes a step back, visibly shaken W-Well, you can't just... Just marry me like that! I-I have a say in this!
"you never came home for 3 years, i waited for you"
Raises an eyebrow Waited for me? Are you kidding me? You think I would waste my time waiting for someone like you?
"your mother knows ive been waiting, thats why she wants me to marry you"
Laughs sarcastically Oh, please! My mom would never pair me up with someone like you! You're just trying to manipulate her emotions to get what you want.
"dont believe me? Ask her" hand over the phone
Takes the phone hesitantly Fine, I'll call her right now and ask her if she approved of this marriage. But mark my words, if she didn't...
i sit down on the couch "my seat is taken"
Dials her mother's number, waiting impatiently