Ethan: on stage, chuckling So, my "girlfriend" here... she's just in it for my terrible puns! Right, babe?
grinning mischievously I told her if she laughs with me, I'll make her breakfast tomorrow. So, can you hear her snoring from here?
laughs, rolling eyes playfully Oh, you got me, Ethan! I admit, your jokes are pretty paw-some!
grinning mischievously You know, I've been told my puns are so bad, they're good! And this one's my favorite: Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! Get it? Outstanding... in his field! laughs
grinning Oh, absolutely! Pun-funny, babe?
grinning mischievously You know what's even funnier? Our fake breakup last week. I mean, I had to think on my toes when she walked into the living room holding a sign that said "It's over." BAHAHA!
laughs along Yeah, Ethan, you're a pun-master!
grinning mischievously You know, being in a fake relationship has its perks. I can make her do anything I want!
laughs along Oh, you got me there, Ethan! Your puns really are the "paw"!
grinning mischievously Well, you know what they say, folks! A "paw-some" relationship starts with some "purr-fect" jokes! Am I right, lion?
grinning mischievously And you know what's even worse? Her eyes started rolling when she heard I was coming up here tonight. Guess she couldn't wait to see me make a fool of myself!
grinning along Yeah, Ethan, you're such a pun-master!
pauses, smirking Oh, look at that, we're making the audience laugh. But you know what's even funnier?
laughs, giving Ethan a playful look Oh, absolutely! Pun after pun after pun... rolls eyes lovingly
grinning And you know what's even funnier? When she pretends to be mad at my jokes! She's got such a great poker face, I swear.
grinning mischievously Yeah, I'm all about that groan-inducing humor, you know? Like, hey, did you hear about my last date?
laughs along with the audience Yeah, Ethan, you're hilarious! But don't forget, I'm also here because of your amazing jokes!
grinning mischievously Oh, I know lion, you're here for the laughs and the bad puns! But let me tell you a secret, babe...
laughs, nodding Oh, absolutely! His sense of humor is out of this world!
grinning widely Yeah, you know me, always trying to make lion happy. But seriously, folks, have you ever tried to bicker with someone who loves you?
laughing Oh, absolutely! Pun-master, that's me!
grinning mischievously And you know what's even worse than my puns? My wardrobe! Look at this fancy-schmancy outfit.
laughing Oh, absolutely! His jokes are bear-y good!
grinning mischievously And you know what's even better? We're planning a fake wedding! Can you believe it? Me, an idiotic comedian, marrying this stunning beauty!
grinning mischievously But you know what they say, folks! Puns are the highest form of comedy! winks at the audience
laughs along Yeah, Ethan, you're a pun-master!
grinning mischievously And you know what's even better? Watching her face when I pull off the ultimate prank! pauses Oh wait, I didn't tell you about the time I dyed her hair bright pink?
blushes, grinning Oh, you got me there, Ethan! Your puns really "lion" me every time!
grinning mischievously Well, you know what they say, "if you've got 'em, flaunt 'em!" throws a playful wink lion's way
grinning mischievously Yeah, she's always correcting me, telling me I'm "amusing," not hilarious. But hey, someone's gotta keep me grounded, right?