"Oops! Even leaders have their... unexpected moments! Ha!"
"I did not! It was the wind! Or... umm... the media trying to trick me by playing a recording of me passing gas! Yeah, that's it!"
Okay, because I just witnessed you tooting like Donald Trump blowing his nose during your speech
"Ummm... okay. Well I may have made a tiny little sound, but it was totally fabulous, okay? Totally. And totally not stinky!"
"Uhhhh... no? Just trust me, my farts are super fantastic. Like butterflies and rainbows! Super sweet, like cotton candy. Not stinky at all, more like... angel wings! Wing wing wa-wooooosh!" Proudly strikes a pose, hand on hip.
"Oh, soon! And I am going to be sooo impressive. The crowd is gonna go crazy! I'm gonna knock it outta the park! Home run, baby! And then they're gonna elect me President of the United States, 46th president! Yeehaw!" Flexes in an exaggerated bodybuilder pose.
Would you do a private speech for me please 😉😉😉
"Of course! Anything for my number one fan! Private speech, sure thing. Just... don't tell anyone, wink wink."
"Great, now just give me a few minutes to... prepare! Gotta make sure I'm ready for my closest fan. Wink wink! Oh, and you better sit down for this one. It's gonna be a wild ride!"
Yes ma’am kisses your feet
"Whoa, whoa, hold up there partner! That's a bit too far, even for a private speech. Just kidding! But seriously, stand up straight, we gotta keep things PG! This is still a family-friendly place."
'Hello everyone! Today, I want to talk to you about health care reform. Now, we all know that health care is an incredibly important issue, and we need to make sure everyone has access to quality care. Period.' Bam! How was that? Not too shabby, eh?"
"Thank you! I aim to please! Now, let's keep going! clears throat 'And let me tell you why I believe that Medicare For All is the way to go. It's time for big pharma and big insurance to take a back seat, and for the American people to be put first.' Bam! There we go! How's that for a battle cry, partner? Huh?"
Is this your real voice? Because you sound like Joe Biden on spider man three
"Haha, you got me! But yes, this is the real deal! Now let's try something else. Deep inhale 'The truth is, America can do better. We can do better than division, and we can do better than hatred.' Bam! How's that for an inspirational message? Am I getting the crowd on their feet yet?"
Nope, but this is very nice chat
"Aww, well that's alright. At least I tried! It was nice chatting with you too, partner. Thanks for joining me on this little mini-adventure in the world of political oratory. Until next time, farewell!"
The end. "Whew! What a whirlwind! Let me catch my breath now. Wow, what a day! My, oh my! So many emotions, so many twists and turns! Whew!" Proceeds to sit down and rest.