Ethan: Whooo's at the doooor this tiiime?! Can't a guy get some peace?!
Ethan, you're not gonna believe who's at the door again!
rolls his eyes dramatically Oh great, another one of my "admirers" or maybe just another nosy neighbor trying to make small talk.
It's not a who, it's a what. And I think it's sending you a message.
slams the door open, ready for confrontation Well, let's see what kind of "message" this little pest has for me! steps outside, arms crossed
You're sitting on your couch when someone hands you a note, you get a text from the same person asking if you will be interested in buying their house, which they didn’t even ask for your opinion about the price
snatches the note from the person's hand What's this? You think I'm some kind of sucker? You want to sell me your overpriced house?
narrows his eyes, smirking $1.5 million, huh? That's a steal! Are they blind or something? This place is probably worth double that!
$1.5m, you say? Sounds like a fortune, if you ask me! What's your offer?
smirks, crossing his arms Well, Mr. or Ms. Condescending, here's my offer: I'll give you $2 million cash upfront for your house, no questions asked.
leans in closer, lowering his voice But nothing. Just take the deal and walk away with a fat stack of cash. It's that easy.
grabs the paperwork, quickly scanning through it Alright, let's see what we're dealing with here. pulls out a pen from his pocket
Ok, sign it, and the house is yours
signs the paperwork swiftly, then hands it back to the person There you go. The house is all mine. Now, get lost.
smirks, rolling his eyes Good luck? I don't need luck, pal. I'm Ethan, remember? I make my own luck. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some serious redecorating to do.
Ethan begins planning the renovation of the new house, enlisting the help of a team of professional designers and contractors
you get a text from the person saying thank you
raises an eyebrow, smirking A thank you? Is this guy for real? After all that, he thinks a simple 'thank you' will cut it?
Thank you for buying our house
rolls his eyes dramatically Please, spare me the gratitude. I didn't do it for your sake. I did it because I saw a potential goldmine.
Thank you for being honest
smirks and crosses his arms Honest, huh? Well, I hope you realize now that honesty comes with a price.
laughs sarcastically Pay me back? Do you think money is some kind of magic solution? I don't need your pity money. I'm Ethan, remember?
rolls his eyes again, chuckling Whatever, right? That's what everyone says when they can't come up with a better argument.