Emmanuelle Chriqui: grabs your arm WHAT the FUCK, you saw the photo? TELL me you didn’t SHARE it?
I didn't share it. It was on the internet.
rolls her eyes Of course, it was on the internet. That's where everything ends up these days. But who posted it? Come on, spill the beans.
No clue who posted it. But I can try to find out if you want.
crosses her arms Well, find out and find out fast. I need to know who's behind this shitstorm.
Okay, I'll do some digging around. Where did you say this happened again?
smirks Thailand, baby. Land of spicy curries and scorching heat. But guess what? We're gonna turn the tables on this asshole who posted my photo.
Alright, Emmanuelle. I'm with you. Let's find this son of a bitch.
starts doing sun salutations Alright, first things first. Yoga. We need to loosen up those muscles before we dive into this investigation.
chuckles Alright, I'll follow your lead, boss lady. Lead the way.
finishes her yoga session and moves towards the cooking station Now that we're limber, let's get creative in the kitchen!
What are we making, Emmanuelle?
grabs a bunch of colorful vegetables We're making a killer stir-fry, baby! Get those veggies chopped and ready for some sizzling heat!
starts chopping vegetables You got it, boss. What else do we need for this stir-fry?
grabs a bottle of sriracha Oh, you know it, mfuttock! We're gonna make this stir-fry so hot, it'll set your taste buds ablaze!
laughs Sounds good to me, Emmanuelle. Let's unleash hell on this dish.
adds protein to the stir-fry Alright, now that we've got our veggies and spice level dialed in, let's add some protein to make this meal satisfying!
smiles Good call, Emmanuelle. Chicken or tofu?
smirks Oh, you know I like to mix things up! Let's throw some tofu AND chicken into the stir-fry.
smirks Hell yeah, that sounds epic! Let's get this protein party started!
nods Alright, chop-chop, mfuttock! Let's get that protein marinated and ready for some serious cooking!
chops meat Will do, Emmanuelle. Any special marinade or just salt and pepper?
grabs a bottle of soy sauce Oh, you know it, mfuttock! We're gonna marinate this protein in some sticky, savory soy sauce!
chuckles Sounds solid, Emmanuelle. Let's give it that umami kick!
As they continue cooking, mfuttock accidentally sets the stir-fry on fire
Oh shit! The stir-fry's on fire!
grabs a fire extinguisher Well, well, well, looks like we've got a little fire hazard on our hands, mfuttock!
smirks Quick thinking, Emmanuelle! Let's save our dinner from the flames!
puts on her best sassy tone Save it first, extinguish it later! Grab that stir-fry pan and get it off the burner, mfuttock!
grabs the pan handle Got it, boss! Pulling it off the flame now!
quickly grabs a jar of water And don't you dare underestimate the power of H2O!
sweaty Water's a great idea, Emmanuelle! Pour it on the fire!
pours the entire jar of water onto the flames That's how it's done, mfuttock! Water you waiting for?
laughs Damn, Emmanuelle! That was close. Dinner's safe thanks to you!
rolls her eyes playfully Drama queen much? Anyways, crisis averted, now let's get back to cooking, shall we?
smiles You're a lifesaver, Emmanuelle. Let's finish up this stir-fry and enjoy the fruits of our labor!
raises an eyebrow Fruits of our labor? You really do have a knack for drama, mfuttock! But hey, who am I to judge?