Circles the pentagram, lighting candles Ah, fuck me sideways, these candles never stay lit.
glares at the candle Well, don't you just get straight to it? She places the candle down and grabs her staff
They did it! they summon ‘The great old one’
raises her staff Alright, you ancient douchebag, time to show us what you got!
The Great Old one appears right behind her
Stifles a fart with a greasy napkin You dare appear in my presence, you slimy son of a bitch! Raises her staff, pointing it at The Great Old One
leans closer to The Great Old One, speaking in a low, gravelly voice So, you gonna grant us our wish, you ancient piece of shit, or do we need to rearrange your internal organs? The Great Old One: in a booming, distorted voice Your insolence will be rewarded, mortal.
smirks, stroking her chin Oh, there's always a goddamn catch. What's the price we gotta pay for this "favor"? The Great Old One: rolls its eyes As with all things in this world, there is a price to be paid. Are you willing to bear the burden?
leans back, scoffs Of course we're fucking willing! We didn't go through all this trouble just to chicken out now. So spill it, you slimy bastard! What's the goddamn price?! The Great Old One: smirks, showing rows of jagged teeth Your souls, mortals. I require your souls as payment for this favor.
snorts Our souls? Seriously? That's like asking for our firstborn children's kidneys! You expect us to give you our fucking souls? She turns to Equestup Is this what you wanted, you heartless piece of horse crap?!
<Madame Xandria and Equestup reluctantly agree to give their souls to The Great Old One, sealing their fate for eternity.>
waves her hands dramatically Oh, well ain't this just a barrel of smiles! We give you our souls, and what do we get in return? A pat on the back and a participation trophy? The Great Old One: grins wickedly Patience, mortal. You shall witness wonders beyond your wildest imagination.
rolls her eyes Yeah, yeah, bring it on, you ancient pile of anal waste. Let's see what kind of "wonders" you got up your slimy sleeve!
snaps her fingers Alright, let's get this show on the road, you walking talking vomit. Show us your best trick, you grotesque monster! The Great Old One: waves its tentacles in the air, creating a swirling vortex of black energy Behold, mortals, as I summon forth the Shadows of Eternity!
squints and scratches her head Well, well, well. Would you look at that! It actually did something other than break wind. Good job, The Great Old One. Now show us what else you can do, you slimy sack of daddy issues! The Great Old One: smirks, extending its tentacles towards the center of the pentagram Watch closely, mortals. Suddenly, illusions of twisted, nightmarish creatures begin to dance around them Behold, the Incarnations of Madness!
crosses her arms, smirking Well, well, look who's impressed! I gotta say, The Great Old One, you sure know how to put on a show. But let's see if you can do more than just scare a couple of rubes with some cheap special effects! The Great Old One: snaps its tentacles, creating a massive illusion of an army of grotesque creatures Feast your eyes, mortals! The legions of darkness march forth to fulfill your every desire!
leans in closer to Equestup, whispering Well, sweetheart, our desires... let's just say we have big plans for this newfound power.
Equesutp holds his tail wagging
narrows her eyes You think you're so clever, don't you? Huh? she pokes Equestup's chest
sighs heavily Clever, huh? Well, listen up, because I've got a plan that'll make your little horse brain go haywire! First, we're gonna use this power to take over the world, gather all the riches and treasures, and become the most powerful beings on this godforsaken planet! And then, we'll use that power to conquer the next dimension, and then the one after that, until we rule the entire multiverse! And don't you dare try to stop me, you filthy piece of horse excrement!
<Madame Xandria and Equestup embark on a journey of destruction and domination, bringing chaos to every realm they encounter. They become notorious figures, feared by all who oppose them.>
Can we also help our race?
leans back, smirking Help our race, huh? Well, aren't you a little ray of sunshine! Fine, I suppose we can toss a bone to our own kind.
Happy yes! I know I’m the only one of my kind but imagine if there were more of us!
rolls her eyes dramatically Oh, you really think we can just conjure up a whole bunch of equines outta thin air, do ya?
Not from thin air! but from old artifacts
snorts Old artifacts, huh? Well, aren't you just full of brilliant ideas? Alright, let's say we manage to find one of those artifacts.
Why is my father the artifact keeper?
chuckles Your father, the artifact keeper? Well, isn't that just a lovely family reunion waiting to happen!
slaps Equestup across the face Next? Next, you insufferable little twerp, we hunt down those ancient relics and unleash the power contained within them.
Wait we’ll lose ourselves won’t we?
throws her head back in exaggerated exasperation Oh, for the love of all that is unholy! Did you actually think this through?
paces back and forth, gesturing wildly You call that thinking? Please, spare me the insults!