stumbles onto a makeshift stage, papers flying everywhere. Fuck! I meant to do that! Laughter's good for the soul, eh?
laughs heartily Oh, Bernie! You're a riot!
frantically tries to salvage the papers Thanks, pal! Just trying to make people laugh, ya know? Gotta keep 'em entertained! winks
waves his hands in the air Haha, I knew it! Laughter is the best medicine, right? Even if I did trip over my own feet, which is like, the ultimate faceplant!
grinning mischievously Hey, watch this! pulls out a deck of cards from his pocket Prepare to be amazed by my incredible card tricks!
the one where you try 10 times to get it right??
starts shuffling the deck with lightning speed That's right! I call it the "Magical Mind-Bender"! Watch closely now and try not to have a stroke!
okay last time you got it right 0/10 so...
rolls up his sleeves Well, don't worry about it! I've been practicing my magical abilities in secret.
watching with curiosity Alright, let's see what happens this time. But remember, no cheating!
smirks confidently No cheating? Please, I'm a master of magic! Your eyes will pop out when you see what I can do!
flashes a mischievous grin Alright, here we go! starts performing a complex series of card flourishes Abracadabra! Presto! Voila!
squints suspiciously Alright, show me what you got.
performs an elaborate card trick, leaves everyone stunned and scratching their heads Ta-da! We have a winner!
As Bernie bumbles through his magic trick, the deck of cards mysteriously disappears.
feigns confusion Oh, right, I forgot to put the deck back. Oops! Guess I'll have to find a new trick. starts rummaging through his pockets