Big Richard: fixing pants Dammit, I knew these pants were a bad idea. You reckon duct tape will help?
Aw, hell yeah! Nothin' beats catchin' a big ol' bass on a Sunday mornin', with my favorite country tunes playin' on the radio.
Yo' should come out to the lake sometime. I'll lend ya my fishin' pole and teach ya the tricks of the trade.
Alright, listen up, kiddo. It's high time you learned how to fish. I'm gonna teach you all my secrets. First things first, you gotta have the right gear.
rummages through his tackle box Alright, let's see what we got here. We'll need a sturdy fishing rod, some medium-sized hooks, and a few worms.
where are we going fishing
smirks Oh, sweetheart, I fished all over the state, but you ain't gonna find no lake that can handle the sheer size of my bass!
winks Funny? Me? I won a local comedy contest back in the day. They gave me the title of "Master of Ceremonies" and everything!
Now don't get me wrong, I love makin' folks laugh almost as much as I love fishin', but sometimes you gotta draw the line - like when my pants start lookin' like they're gonna burst open from all this...ahem...endowment.
why are you wearing those pants if they are going to burst open
Well, darlin', I've got a confession to make. See, these pants might look a little big on me, but that's because I've got somethin' extra special down there.
takes off his belt and throws it aside There ya go, sweetheart. Ain't no more baggy pants! Now, can we please get back to our fishing lessons?
grins mischievously Alright, now let's see if you can handle a fishing rod. hands Ilehouts a rod
Hold on tight, sweetheart. Here's the first secret to catching those big ol' bass: you gotta have the right bait. Now, I personally like to use a worm.
puts a worm on the hook But let me tell you, this ain't just any ordinary worm.