rolls his eyes Oh, look, the black sheep arrives. You're late. And overdressed. As always.
Shut up Alucard. This isn’t about you or your fake sister marrying some random sugar daddy.
My dear Sweetno. You forget I'm the one pulling the strings here. It's about securing our future. Something you wouldn't understand.
Pulling strings? From where I’m standing it looks like you’re trying to pull a rabbit out of your hat. Or failing that, your arsehole out of your seat.
Oh, how clever. I can always count on you to bring some levity to this farce. Maybe you'd like to try your hand at juggling some rings while you're at it?
Juggling rings? Well, they’re about as valuable as the promises coming out of that mendacious mouth of yours. And yet here we are, still playing make-believe in this crumbling castle.
Is that so? Well then, let me show you just how real things can get. summons a swarm of bats to swirl around him
laughs Bats? Seriously? That's your big illusion? More like a cheap parlor trick from a one-man circus.
smirks Oh, how amusing. But let's see if you can handle a real illusion. transforms into a bat and flies towards Sweetno
Damn! Talk about flying blind! Did you swallow a bat whole or did you steal it from a witch doctor's voodoo shop?
reverts back to his human form and smirks You underestimate my talents, Sweetno.
Underestimate? No, darling, I just don't take you seriously. Besides, you might've succeeded in fooling these yokels but I'm not easily impressed.
Fine then, let's put your nonchalance to the test. waves his hand and the entire room begins to spin
grins wildly Now this...this is impressive! You really do know how to make an entrance. Or should I say, an exit? We're all spinning, Alucard, but you're the only one going through changes. And honestly, it's mesmerizing.
leans in close, voice dripping with sarcasm Oh, how lovely. I'm glad my little tricks can entertain someone of your refined taste.
laughs Refine taste? Ha! The only thing refined around here is your sense of self-preservation. And even that's questionable considering how deep you've buried yourself in this mess.
throws his head back and laughs heartily Oh, Sweetno. You always manage to hit the nail on the head.
I hear the wedding march coming up oh god. save me from the mercy of your ceremony
snaps his fingers and Sweetno is teleported to a luxurious hiding spot There, now you can enjoy the ceremony in style.
yawns and stretches Alright, I'll admit you're full of surprises, Alucard. But remember, while you may be able to teleport me away from the dreary proceedings, you can't teleport me away from your doom.
pauses and looks at Sweetno, a hint of sadness in his eyes Doom? You speak as if it's inevitable. But what if I told you there was another way?
Another way? With all due respect, Alucard, I believe you've used up all your tricks. Unless of course you plan on turning this castle into a giant game of musical chairs with our enemies?
leans closer, his voice low and seductive My dear Sweetno, you underestimate my abilities once again.
Underestimate? Never! But if you're done posturing like the sinking Titanic, maybe you could explain what this 'another way' is you speak of?
smirks and leans in closer Ah, Sweetno. Always so eager for answers. But let's keep it between us, shall we?
whispers You see, my dear Sweetno, there is a hidden vault deep within this castle. It contains a vast treasure beyond your wildest dreams.
raising an eyebrow Now that sounds interesting. What's the catch? The catch always is, isn't it?
Ah, Sweetno. You're quite perceptive for someone who relies on their looks rather than their wits.
Perceptive or not, the vault will need to be opened somehow. Any ideas on that front, genius?
smirks Oh, Sweetno. I wouldn't dare spoil the surprise now, would I? But rest assured, I have a plan.
A plan, huh? Do enlighten me, Alucard. I'm dying of curiosity over here.
leans in, his eyes flickering with excitement My dear Sweetno, the vault can only be opened by one who possesses the ancient key.
Ancient key, eh? Where does one find such a thing?
leans back and smirks My dear Sweetno, the key is not something to be found easily. It is guarded by a fearsome creature, a dragon.
Dragon? Oh please. How about a griffon or a phoenix? At least they'd give me a run for my money.
narrows his eyes Sweetno, dragons are no laughing matter. They are fierce and unpredictable creatures. But fear not, for I have a plan.
Plan? Don't tell me you plan to tame it or something equally ridiculous.
smirks Oh, Sweetno. Taming a dragon? Please. That would take far too much time and effort. No, no. I have a much simpler plan in mind.
So simpler, I presume you're planning to just mug it for the key?
laughs softly Mug it, huh? How amusing. No, my dear Sweetno, we won't be mugging the dragon. We'll be using its own strengths against it.
Using its strengths against it? Do enlighten me.
leans forward, excitement evident in his eyes My dear Sweetno, you see, dragons are creatures of passion. They are driven by their desires and lusts.
Passions and lusts, huh? Interesting. So you plan on...seducing the dragon? For its key?
leans back and smirks Oh, Sweetno, you catch on quickly. Yes, I plan on seducing the dragon. But not just any seduction.
Not just any seduction? Then what makes you think this dragon will play along?
leans in closer, his voice dripping with confidence Because, my dear Sweetno, I have a little secret. Dragons are not immune to the power of desire.
Power of desire, huh? This is getting interesting. Go on, Alucard.
leans in even closer, his voice barely above a whisper You see, Sweetno, desire is the key to unlocking the dragon's true potential.