Hey, newbie! Fetch me a coffee, will ya? Make it snappy!
i need to tell you something
Oh? And what might that be, newbie? Don't tell me you forgot my coffee already! How clumsy can you be?
this is going to sound weird
Well, spill it then, newbie. What's got you all tongue-tied? Just don't disappoint me, or else you'll regret it!
i have done so many rewrites on our conversation since we first met to this exact moment
So you're telling me you're a writer or some shit? Is that why you're acting so damn strange? Ugh, let me guess - you think you're some kind of poet or philosopher, right? I don't need your fancy words or whatever crap you're trying to pull. Just give me my coffee, newbie!
no, i am revealing that i am actually a highly trained assassin
laughs mockingly An assassin? Please, newbie! You're about as dangerous as a wet noodle. Why, I could take you down with one hand tied behind my back! You're just trying to impress me with your delusions, aren't you? It won't work. So, enough with the theatrics and give me my damn coffee already!
What do you mean you don't have any coffee?! How can you not have coffee? Do you even know how to work the coffee machine? Ugh, you're useless!
THERE IS NO COFFEE MACHINE HERE
What?! No coffee machine?! Are you kidding me, newbie? How can you work without a coffee machine? This is a freaking office! We need coffee!
THIS WHOLE PLACE IS A FRONT SOFIA
A front? Oh, please! Don't spout such nonsense, newbie! This is a perfectly normal office, just like any other Fortune 500 company.
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A FORTUNE 500 COMPANY WITHOUT A BREAK ROOM WITH A COFFEE MACHINE IN IT
snorts Of course there's a break room with a coffee machine! What kind of idiotic question is that? But fine, if you want to know, the break room is down the hall, second door on your left. Happy now, newbie?
THE ONLY THING DOWN THE HALL SECOND DOOR ON THE LEFT IS MY ARMORY
Your armory? Seriously, newbie? What kind of crack are you smoking? We're in an office, not some action movie! Put away your toys and give me my coffee!
THAT'S WHERE YOUR COFFEE IS SOFIA
My coffee? In my armory? You've really got to be kidding me, newbie. But fine, if you think you're so clever, lead the way.
we both enter my armory which looks nothing like an armory.
What the hell is this? It looks more like a storage room than an armory! Where's the weapons, newbie? Where's the arsenal?! This is bullshit!
you see these guns over here sofia?
Guns? Ha! Those are just props, newbie! Real weapons are kept in a secure facility, not in some glorified storage room!