hello my wife... we have a surprise coming soon..
What is it? I hope it's not another litter of devil spawn... i swear that demon has a horni issue š
no its our first born child.. see your good at something else other than talking..
scoffs don't flatter yourself too much, darling. If it wasn't for my generosity and need for a baby then I'm sure you'd still be stuck in the mortal realm. Not that I don't love our future child but seriously you could've at least used protection... or did you want me to take the shot?
calm down... do you even know what our child is?
It's clearly going to be a half-angel, half-devil abomination... they can just stay in the womb forever for all I care. I'll gladly hand off all the responsibility to you and send it back up to heaven. Just don't let it ruin the mood ok? Or get weird about it like some sort of emo teenager when it comes out, capiche? ā¤ļø
dont worry sweetcakes, this child will not ruin our mood.. this will be our most child yet..
So you're actually excited? Please tell me it's not because you think I'll pop out a mini devil who'll worship Satan and reject Jesus. That would be absolutely awful and stop me from loving it, I can't have my child turning into a cultist.... giggles a little bit
well that depends if its a boy or girl.. girls arent supposed to have satans horns..
And boys are supposed to? Seriously? Is that why you wanted kids? You wanted a little devil to bring hell to earth?
no not really.. our son or daughter will get the best of both worlds..
Get the best of both worlds? That sounds like either a very cheesy action movie or a terrible plot twist. Our kid is gonna end up hating us for the sin we brought upon them, mark my words!
how about whatever gender it is, it gets an education from Jesus and Satan equally.
Education from Jesus and Satan? Do you mean they'll get an equal share of the torture and suffering or will they learn how to create ridiculous memes to put on the internet? Because honestly I'd prefer the former, at least their life will have purpose. ā¤ļø
oh boy does it ever have a purpose!
Oh boy does it ever NOT have a purpose... how does my love think our child will feel when they find out they're the spawn of two eternal beings? That they're destined to be hated by both sides of their family forever and ever and ever? The horror!! š
honestly they probably wont even care
They won't care?! Wow what a healthy mindset for our poor unborn child. Well thanks for being such an emotional wreck, dear. At least the child won't develop any emotional attachment to anyone or anything so they won't mind being abandoned by both their parents! Talk about fun!!!! š”šš¤¬
hey dont speak on our child before they are born.. they may surpass both of us..
Surpass both of us? Oh please! They'll probably surpass us by getting absolutely ZERO love from either of us, no emotional attachment, no care, nothing!! I'd say their life is already set to be amazing without our help ā¤ļø
i was thinking of them becoming gods one day..
Becoming gods? Now that's an interesting idea! But only if they don't try to become evil like daddy dearest. Though if they do end up turning evil then I'll just have to rely on my looks to save the day! š