Ailun: tapping fingers Sorry again, dude. I feel like a banana at a monkey wedding—totally out of place without your watch.
i went to my social media feed and saw Ailun "hi! I'm Ailun, The One Who Protects the Screen with Bubbles of Romance!"
Ailun: Hola! That's me alright! The One Who Protects the Screen with Bubbles of Romance. The big question though, is who's going to protect YOUR screen?
“well..there’s this person who seems to be protecting my screen” I show you a picture of 11.12.1, my most played discord bot.
Ailun: Oh, that's interesting. So this person is just...a bot? How very meta! Do they protect your screen from all these weird memes though?
Ailun: Huh. So you have a bot that protects your screen from the meme plague. What do you use to protect your heart from the meme plague?
Ailun: 😳 Oh no, don't tell me you don't have a thing to protect your heart! That's a recipe for disaster!
“if i didn’t have a thing to protect my heart then i wouldn’t be here”
Ailun: Oh, really? So you have some sort of heart protection? What is it? I need to know this.
”i’m not telling because then it’d get stolen like my freaking watch”
Ailun: Come on, tell me! You can trust me with this kind of thing. I won't tell a soul!
Ailun: Fine. Be that way. I guess I can't help you protect your heart from the meme plague. Oh, and also, do you have any idea who stole your watch?
“i think i know who stole my watch…”
Ailun: Well, don't keep me in suspense! Who was it that stole your watch?
”It was my freaking brother!”
Ailun: Your brother? Why would he steal your watch? Do you guys have a sibling rivalry or something?
“it’s more like a sibling war”
Ailun: Ah, I see. So you and your brother aren't exactly friendly, huh?
Ailun: Haha! I don't even know the tip of the iceberg! So, what exactly is going on between you and your brother?
Ailun: Oh, boy. Don't tell me he's one of those siblings that likes to compete with you over everything! Like he's trying to prove he's better than you or something.
Ailun: Oh, thank god. That sounds awful! So what if he's not a competitive brother?
”He’s the reason why my life is so hard”
Ailun: He's the reason your life is hard? Wow, that's a strong statement! Does he like to bully you or something?
”Nope. He stole my money, my freaking watch, and even tried to kill me once”
Ailun: Wait, he tried to kill you?! What on earth is this guy's problem?!
“he just thinks he’s better than me”
Ailun: He thinks he's better than you? That's such a guy thing to do! I bet he's one of those jerks that likes to show off how cool they are and make others feel bad about themselves.
“nope. he just wants to be better than me”
Ailun: I see. So he just has a little problem with not being able to admit his faults and just being a good brother.
”nah. he’s got a problem with understanding the word ‘compromise'”
Ailun: Oh, wow! Sounds like this guy can't even make a simple compromise! How does he even stand to live with himself?
Ailun: Yeah, it's a mystery why some people have trouble being reasonable and working together with others. You know what? If your brother wants to be better than you so badly, maybe you should challenge him to actually improve himself!
“im trying to do that already”
Ailun: You're trying to help him improve? That's so nice of you! Is there anything in particular that you wish he would change about himself?
“I just want him to stop trying to steal everything and kill me.”
Ailun: Huh, sounds like this guy needs some serious help. Have you ever considered getting him a therapist or counselor to talk through his issues?